Five Hundy by Midnight 289: They Talk About It and Do Nothin’ ‘Bout It

Las Vegas podcast #289 includes:

  • Half and Half opener
  • Celine returns early
  • More on the Marilyn ripple at Wynn
  • Beso and BB King’s face banktrupcy
  • Living the Milf Life
  • Ferris wheel update
  • We love our sponsor, Vegas Mate
  • Listener calls and e-mails about getting some action in Las Vegas, Club Grazie offers, pub crawls, Cosmopolitan, Atlantic City, Lake of Dreams, Carnevino, Craftsteak, Terry Fator and more
  • Call us at (702) 866-9494

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Direct download of the podcast: Five Hundy By Midnight 2/20/11 (59:57 min, 54.9 MB) or subscribe.


44 thoughts on “Five Hundy by Midnight 289: They Talk About It and Do Nothin’ ‘Bout It

  1. celene’s last show was April 25, 2009. The stock market hit bottom in the first week of March, 2009.

  2. Is it arrogance for the sands group to suggest that the comps are a percentage of the theortetical “win”. If there was a theoretical win should we be giving back to the casino? Yea the term Hold is more appropriate. Of course to suggest that casino expects you to lose would be inappropriate.

    The comps that have always been given are based upon $15 of free play on 2,500 points. The ordinalry player earns 1 point per dollar. Therefore the comp is .6% of the coin in and the theoretical hold is 10% of coin in, thus .6% divided by 10% is 6% of casino hold or your theoretical loss. The gold player earns 1.5 points per dollar played thus the higher return 50% moreor 9% onthe hold.

    The problem is these comps are not knew. They have been around since the joint opened. Whst is new are the lack of extras, fewer rooms and lesser free play to higher players.


  3. Ok, gonna have a little rant here.

    Earl of Sandwich is dead.

    Long live Holsteins. Ok, it might not be as healthy – but their alcholic milkshakes HAVE to be tried. I had the ‘Frozen Grasshopper’ – vanilla ice cream, peppermint meringe, chocolate crunchies, creme de menthe, van gough chocolate dutch vokda. Wow. Wife had ‘Drunken Monkey’ which was equally as good.

    The kettle chips were also amazing. Don’t even get me started on their beer selection. Three more days of holiday left. You know where to find us.

  4. I’ve heard it’s a great place, but I see it more comparable to BLT Burger than Earl of Sandwich in terms of the type of restaurant it is.

  5. My new goal in life is to obtain the Pearl Necklace level on the M-ILF card.

    Also, Michelle, only one game was awesome enough to break my Angry Birds habit… Cut the Rope. It’s even more fun and addictive.

  6. Sorry Tim, probably did not explain myself well in my sugary rush state. So will try in my drunken and tired state. What I meant is that Earl is/used to be the main food in our mind, of any type, just before Vegas. That may well have changed. Will wait until next year to find out!

  7. A Five Hundy foot Ferris Wheel? How high did the Balloon Experience go? I can’t believe the FAA would allow a 500 foot ferris wheel (that’s half the height of the Stratosphere tower) that close to the airport.

  8. I had to look this up, because it was bugging me. The London Eye is 135 meters (443 feet) tall, so the proposed structure would be larger. Thanks, Wikipedia!

  9. In response to where to pick up legit chicks….not hookers. My answer…table games. Flirt by topping their bet, taking care of waitress tips for them, and coaching them on basic strategy. Then….dinner. Good luck.

  10. Some bonus tips on the picking up chicks sans paying:

    Step 1) Drink heavily, but not to an out of control state. This will cure the shyness. I have 0 game in real life, but it just flows out of me in Vegas once the booze is in me.

    Step 2) Stock your room with booze. This will be your lure for…

    Step 3) Find a group of girls (in the afternoon) – you know they will be figuring out their plans for that night. Invite them to come drink with you in your room. Over-emphasize the awesomeness of your room – once they’re drunk, and you have free booze, nobody is paying attention.

    Step 4) Set your sights moderately low. In this group, ignore the hottest ones and the ugliest ones, and focus on the ones who are in the middle. This will make you seem more human to the ugly ones (which will help the vibe), will overwhelm the modest girls, and will piss off (in a good way) the hot chicks.

    Step 5) Go with the flow. At some point, if you’ve played your cards right, you will become the prize of the evening, and one girl will make a power play. When this happens, you are coasting home – just go with it. Just don’t get fixated on one girl over another (except the ugly ones…because nobody wants that…).

    Step 6) Seal the deal. As you guys go out, go with them to whatever club/thing they want to do. You will have no problem getting in, because you are with a group of chicks! Then, once the group divides up to dance (they will not divide before this, so there is no way to escape any sooner)…you know what to do. Taxi!

    In full disclosure, I have only employed this strategy twice – and it was effective both times. One neat trick – if the girl is in her early 30’s, get ready to ride. When this happened to me, it was as if she set out to prove to the world that she was still young in bed – and trust me, she proved it!

    One final note – while it’s totally nice to get laid, don’t judge success and/or failure by getting laid. Go to have fun, and if you get some, it’s just gravy. But don’t let the search for vajin ruin a good Vegas trip.

    Good luck!

  11. Where did you play three card poker on a machine? What type of machine is thre card poker found on?

  12. Played it at Mirage. It’s an electronic table game. Big machine with five or six seats and a video dealer.

    The payouts on the machine aren’t as good as at an actual table, unfortunately.

  13. “Designer New Balance” is redundant, is it not?

    If it’s not, it will be once I am elected Emperor…..

  14. Thanks Tim and Michelle for reading my email and to the advice so far. I will drink some but not much, I cannot teach basics to the games since I don’t know it myself. I am not setting the trip up as a get laid trip but sure would be nearly as good as a jackpot win 🙂

  15. I’d comment on the “getting chicks”, but Tim premised the whole discussion on legality. So scratch off the 1978 Ford panel van with astroturf in the back.

  16. Hey Steve it’s really easy. Win the megabucks and start showing cash and the women will flock!

    If not possible go Leykis 101! Pick up fake atm recipes found by google. Find a few ladies have a brief conversation then write your cell or your room number on the receipt! Gold diggers will flock to you and you can use them and go about your business.

    FYI Steve getting laid is much more fun when your not tricking stupid women go have fun party it up and meet new facebook friends.

    p.s. your money goes much further in the ice lounge 21 below. Since it is cold in there your prey won’t feel the full effect of the liquor until they get to normal temperatures. But in most stated dude that is Rape.

  17. The proper pronunciation of Beso is more like “besso”, like the word “best” or “esoteric”. Saying it “bayso” like in the word “baseball” or like “beezo” is incorrect.

    Also, Tim & Michele, at the end of last week’s episode of NBC’s “Outsourced” there was a funny reference to the Paris Hotel in Vegas that you might find useful for your weekly introduction to the show.


  18. Tim is right, my play at Mississippi Stud and 3-Card machines did earn slot points. Who knows if that will change?

    Anyway, the cash back and real-money comps program was hard to understand. I think it differs from the old MGM program because you do get free play at a lower level , and get a 1$ real comp for every $100 wagered. — I’ve always experienced way better rfbs write-offs from MGM than TR. Most of my bankroll is 60% table, 35% VP, and about 5-10% on a trip to slots. I want to say though I game about 7 hours a day. Everyone I spoke to said that the MGM is being ambiguous about the system because they don’t want to worry their table players. I was told both times, in a pointed way, when checking in at the players club that they still Value their table players, and this isn’t a move to replace table players with slot players. Who knows how much BS that is..

    If someone has more info on the M-LIFE, let us know. We know you aren’t a victim of circumstance, you still be-long, don’t get me wrong!

  19. Oh yeah, gold lounges are coming– they advertise these on the property tour default channel on the TV. It might be good, MGM usually has better food as a whole than Harrah’s. But I love me some Diamond Lounge, so it’s wait and see for me, especially since they haven’t rolled anything out– and I saw no construction or “coming soon” signs on properties.

  20. OMG! I just read:

    “Anonymous, because I’m going to hell’s” comment about picking up chicks!..I think he broke the “man code” on this one. As a female this is valuable information and will be well noted. We are headed out to our Happy Place this weekend and I will be on the look out for all those “tips”!…lol ..too funny

    BTW Since this is my first time posting on here I want to say bravo to Tim and Michele for putting up a great podcast. It will scratches the itch.

    We love you guys:)

  21. Got an M-Life e-mail today and all I could think was FMLife, ha!

    Also, I like the new banner. Non-creepy FTW.

    Thanks for the podcast!

  22. Hey Patty in Ohio, where in Ohio are you from? I will be in Vegas from 3/1 until 3/4 including 2 nights on the strip and one in the Rush tower at the Nugget (thanks to Tim and Michelles review, I just had to try it).

  23. Yep, met my now ex-wife that way, she met affairs one and two the same way,married affair number two, lol

  24. CEXE.PK – Circle Entertainment Inc. Robert FX Sillerman – CEO Propose to build Large Observation Wheels – Ferris Wheels. Las Vegas – Orlando – Coming

  25. Hey Michelle – tried finding your “stint” on Letterman from the Friday before Valentine’s Day. Where was your Q&A?

  26. Michele’s brief appearance wasn’t a Q&A… just a brief appearance when the camera swept the crowd toward the end of the show. She was in the front row of the balcony.

  27. Hey Dan, back when it was just Casino Windsor I was there. Ever since the passport laws went into effect, I havn’t been back. What were you wanting to know?

    I don’t remember any pay tables. Not that it would matter, I’m sure they’ve been “Caesared”.

    Didn’t stay in the hotel itself, found it much better to priceline. I think if you chose 3 or 4 star hotel, and put in your bid, you’ll get the hilton every time. They have a shuttle that runs every 20 minutes or so, but in the summer, it’s a nice enough walk. The only time you’ll see Detroit, and not fear for your life is lookin across the river. hehe.

    Hope that helped a bit.

  28. I’m in the middle of a nine day trip…Funny the getting laid thing…I ran into Mystery from the Pick-Up-Artist Tv show from VH1 he had a three day boot camp on how to pickup women and get laid. I saw him at the elevators at Flamingo where he was having the boot camp. I had to look it up he is charging an OMG amount of Three thousand per attendee.

  29. Too bad the guy looking to get “lucky” while in Vegas isn’t going in the middle of July. That’s when the Fat Girl Convention (more properly known at The BBW Network Bash) will be held at the Tuscany.

    I have been to five events like this in Vegas and have gotten “lucky” at all but one (where I realized I would have more fun doing Vegasy stuff like drinking and gambling vice Bash stuff).

    Anyone interested should go to and read all about it, especially the boards. Ideally you would also come and chat in the #bbwnetwork irc channel to get to know some of the women in a non-threatening way.

    A word of caution though – a lot of these women are looking for Mr. Right, not Mr. Right Now. And a lot of these women get upset if anyone thinks the Bash is a meat market, even though for most of the guys and some of the women, it is. So tread carefully, and remember to be subtle.

    Happy Hunting and Good Luck! ( I do wish this for you).

    EJKorvette on the boards

  30. I did not get lucky since I was not willing to pay for it. Had lots of offers for company at 530am wed morning for 200 a shot. If one of the three very hot hooker in cesars would have offered my mind may have changed, I assume they were off duty at the time

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